Diversify your travel portfolio

So your 401(k) is shot, your mutual funds are down 80 percent, and you still want to spend like it's 1999 huh? Yeah, I know the feeling.

Fortunately, there is still a place where you can spend a little, and get a lot. It's a bit off the beaten path, but if you like bizarre, hot, and memorable destinations - ya gotta check this place out: MEXICO! That's right, and I'm not talking about Cancun, Cozumel, Puerto Vallarta, or any of those wimpy touristy places. I'm talking about Culiacan, man! It's hardcore Mexico!

Quick Fact 1: How to get there:

1-	Pronounce Cancun incorrectly to your cab driver, fall asleep, then wake up several hours later in Culiacan.
2-	Book a vacation package online, listing the following destination criteria:
	* No traditional tourist activities * No air-conditioned hotels * No English-speaking natives * No ATM machines near by * No refunds
3-	Receive an invitation from a brother who lives there.
	(I chose number 3)

Quick Fact 2: What to bring

1-	A medium-sized hand towel to function as your daily sweat rag.
2-	A large beach towel to function as your back-up sweat rag and temporary tent.

Culiacan is the economically depressed capital city of the state of Sinaloa, which is located near the western shore of Mexico. It is also where my little brother, William (the "Beej") is currently living and working as a missionary. Later this fall, when he leaves, Beej will have done about 20 months worth of volunteer work in the Culiacan area. Man, he rocks! So I decided to venture down to Culiacan to find out just what exactly this land of dust and decay is all about.

Culiacan is composed of two very different areas: the city center, and the suburbs. I spent most of my time in the suburbs - where Beej lives. The roads here are made of dirt and rocks, and are lined with overgrown bushes, shrubs, and weeds. The typical casa is painstakingly crafted with cracked cement walls, rusty sheet metal roofs, and dirt floors. Interior décor is generally sparse: an old couch, mini refrigerator, and water dispenser. However, the most surreal and out of place home appliance can be found right in the middle of the living room. Yeah, you guessed it: a totally slammin' stereo system! Seriously - walk by just about any dilapidated and totally shot casa and you'll feel some serious bass radiating out. Either theft is extremely rare here, or the stereos are manned 24/7 - because it would literally take a fraction of a second to peel a wall away and make off with the tunes!

(Side note: I'm sure that you have noticed that more and more modern summer home designs have been taking on international flavors. By sending me an e-mail request, I will provide you with a rare step-by-step guide to building "The Culiacan: Your Summer Getaway in 3 Easy Steps". Basic explosives, and a few old milk crates are really all you need to get started.)

Getting around town is a total blast! You will never ride a bus like those found cruising the streets of Culiacan. Each bus reflects its driver's personality and artistic flare. However, while each bus is unique, there are a few common themes that I found among all buses: They all have at least five representations of the Virgin Mary of Guadalupe, multiple antennae (none of which are used for communication purposes), a decal of Yosemite Sam, and a Kenwood sticker affixed on the engine hood (leading me to believe that Kenwood may in fact be sponsoring a covert Mexican mass transportation systems operation).

If the bus isn't for you, walking the dirt roads can be pretty entertaining as well - or at least running into the myriad furry and feathered creatures will prove to be. Dogs in particular, it is reported, seem to enjoy visiting Mexico so much that they stay, reproduce street-side, and then roam around aimlessly looking for food and entertainment. My street hiking adventures brought me into direct contact with wild cats, chickens, horses, random birds, dogs, and a few other street-dwelling creatures that have yet to be assigned to a specific genus. Here is a video clip of a rare techno-hip-hop hound that I personally witnessed performing some kind of strange hypnotic rave-like dance. Immediately after this remarkable display, I blacked out for approximately three hours. I think they call this phenomenon "loosing time".

But I must admit, the most striking element of Culiacan is, by far, the people who live there. These are the most humble, kind, and generous people that I have met in a long time. It seems like the less they have, the more they are willing to give. My brother introduced me to a number of locals, who were quick to invite me into their homes, and even quicker to offer me food, water, and the best seat in the house, which is right in front of their rickety old fan. Pretty cool. And regardless of the poor living conditions, the lack of medical facilities, and the ultra high unemployment rate, there is a tremendous sense of warmth and generosity among these people. Yeah, there is something unique going on in Culiacan. And while the lasting impressions of this small city might not be as flashy as those of Beijing, Munich, or Jerusalem - they will definitely leave one feeling a bit more humble and content.

So if you just lost all of your Grandmother's money in that super-router-computer-telecom-financial services-communications-biotech-internet IPO that just went bust, or if you are the President of that same company - Culiacan will still welcome you with open arms - no questions asked. And if you tell them that Beej sent you, they might just give you the coveted seat in front of the fan - who knows.